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The Protector and the Chilld

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PandoricaPond
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« on: November 22, 2010, 10:34:57 am »

The protector and the child

Prologue
The Doctors Warning

A young girl ran through the empty streets of Cardiff, heart hammering. As panicked as she was, she knew she must be silent, her life depended on it. She looked around for someone, anyone that could help her. A shadow cast on a wall made her freeze. She darted into an alley and backed against the wall.
It seemed an age before the creature passed. She stood and walked to the mouth of the alley. The creature faded into the distance and the girl sighed a breath of relief. The relief, however, was short lived as she turned out of the alley and into two more of the creatures. “Halt!” The first creature screeched. “Ple… Please.” The girl whimpered, her American accent clear, even over the strong wind. “We do not show mercy!” The second creature said, harshly. Anger built in the girl for a brief moment. “You killed my mom, mother fu…” Her anger subsided as quickly as it had come and she trailed off. “Hostile elements will be exterminated!” The first creature said. In unison, they screamed. “Exterminate! Exterminate! EXTERMIN…!” “Oh, do you ever shut up?!” A mans voice had come from the shadows, cutting the Daleks off. Both the two Daleks and the girl turned their heads towards the source of the voice. The girl was more scared than the Daleks. The man should not have been there. She knew for a fact, he was not meant to be there.
The man appeared, almost god like, from the shadows. The girl’s heart skipped a beat. “Now! Are you going to leave, or am I going to have to do something incredibly brave and heroic?” The man said turning his head to the girl and winking. “Doctor! You are an enemy of the Daleks! You will be exterminated!” The first Dalek screeched. “No, I won’t.” The Doctor said, seeming quite sure of himself. “You are defenceless! You will be exterminated!” The first Dalek repeated. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. You keep saying that. But! I am not defenceless!” The Doctor said. “Where is your defence?” The second Dalek asked. “Her.” The Doctor stated matter of factly, pointing to the girl. The Daleks and the girl spoke at the same time. “Her?” Me?”
“Yes. Because, this whole world is under her control. If I’m right, and I usually am, then I should be able to do this.” He said, clicking his fingers. The Daleks disappeared and the girl gasped. The Doctor turned to her, his expression serious. “Michelle Rosenberg, you are in more danger than you could possibly imagine. Come with me. We don’t have much time.”
Michelle’s eyes snapped open. She sat bolt upright and looked around her bedroom. “He’s coming.” She said. “He’s finally coming.” She smiled.
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#Doctor: Amy was frightened. I was frightened. But we survived, you know, and the relief of it... And so she kissed me. #Rory: And you kissed her back. #Doctor: No, I kissed her mouth. #Rory: Funny.

#Companions; DOCTOR!!!

#Doctor: RUN!!!

#Doctor: Bowties are cool.

#Doctor: Fezzes are cool
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« Reply #1 on: November 22, 2010, 10:39:44 pm »

Great start! Im liking it already Smiley
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« Reply #2 on: November 22, 2010, 10:41:22 pm »

I agree. I look forward to the next chapter
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It eats you, starting with your bottom


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« Reply #3 on: December 17, 2010, 07:43:58 pm »

Good start. Hope we get a chance to read more Cool
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« Reply #4 on: January 17, 2011, 01:20:29 pm »

Chapter One

The Guardian

"Michelle. Michelle, it's time to wake up." For a second, Michelle didn't recognise the voice. "Michelle! I'm going to be late for work!" Michelle opened her eyes to see the source of the Welsh accent. "Hey Gwen." Said Michelle. Michelle blinked. Gwen Cooper had been, for all intents and purposes, her carer for the last two years. So it was a complete mystery to her how she could not recognise her voice. She deduced that it was the dream. It had shaken her. She had seen the Doctor in her dreams before but he had never spoken to her. And he had certainly never appeared in that dream.

Gwen looked at Michelle, slightly worried about the expression on her face. Michelle saw this and smiled. "Weird dream." Was all Michelle needed to say. Gwen nodded. "Come on. We don't want you missing school." Said Gwen. "Again." She added, with a slight smirk. Michelle rolled her eyes. "One time. That was one time, Gwen." Gwen chuckled then exited the room.

Michelle waited for the sound of the door closing. When the sound reached her ears, she dived under the bed and pulled a suitcase out. Dumping it on the bed, she opened it and gathered what remained of her clothes from the wardrobe, flinging it all in. She grabbed a bag that had been hidden for months in the back of her wardrobe and placed that next to the suitcase.

She practically skipped downstairs. He was coming. The man she had waited for for years, was finally coming to get her. The warning had not put her off. Danger was something that came with the Doctor. Whatever danger she was in, she'd deal with it. It was worth it to finally see the Doc… Her thoughts were interrupted by a voice in her head. "Hello?" The voice, a girl, said. The girl sounded younger than her. She can't have been older than six or seven. "Er, hello?" Michelle said, out loud but she hoped the girl would hear. "Hi." The girl said, sounding cheery. "How are you doing that?" Michelle asked, this time thinking it. It was a strange feeling. She knew she was psychic but she had never been directly contacted by someone before. "I'm psychic." The girl said. "So are you." She added, still sounding cheery. "Ok, how'd you find me?" The strain on her psychic abilities becoming too much. She winced.

"Are you ok?" The girl asked, sensing something was wrong. "I'm fine." Michelle replied, lying. The last thing she needed was a scared child in her head. "What's your name?" Michelle asked. "Robyn. Robyn Smith." She answered. "You?" She asked. "I'm Michelle. Michelle Hope Rosenberg." Michelle said, the pain becoming more intense. She sat down on the bottom step, clinging her head. "So, why'd you contact me?" Michelle asked, trying her hardest to ignore the pain. "You were thinking about my daddy." Robyn replied. "Your daddy? Who's your daddy?" Michelle asked. "The Doctor." Robyn said. Michelle's eyes narrowed. "And your mom?" She asked slowly. "Amy Pond." Robyn replied. Michelle's head shot up. "I've gotta go." Michelle said, breaking contact with Robyn.

Michelle shot upstairs, ran to her wardrobe and took out a sketch book. She cleared her suitcase and bag from the bed and sat. She searched through the book, drawing after drawing flashing past her in her hurry. Finally, she came to the picture she was looking for. A man and a woman standing on a beach. This had been one of the dreams that affected her the most. The woman loved the man, and the man returned those feelings. A caption at the bottom of the page. 'The Doctor and Rose Tyler on Bad Wolf Bay.' Scrawled underneath it was the caption. 'The first time.' Michelle sat, staring at the picture. She did not understand. Amy Pond with the Doctor? "Why." She mumbled. A single tear fell down onto her sketch book. She had felt the Doctors love for Rose as strong as if it were her own. His love for her stretched across universes, literally. She had felt how heartbroken he was when he left her on Bad Wolf Bay with his double. He had never told anyone that, not only was he heartbroken, but jealous. He was insanely jealous of his double. So much so, he wanted to defy the rules and break through the wall that separated them. He wanted to tell her. He needed to utter those three words he hadn't said before because he'd feared them. So she couldn't understand why he'd be with Amy and have a child with her. After everything, she couldn't grasp why.

She flicked through the book, looking at some of the other pictures. Reading the captions as she went. 'The Master and the year that never was' The year she remembered because of her psychic abilities. 'The Doctors detox.' It was a drawing of the Doctor miming salt but Donna not getting it. The Doctors words echoed in her head. 'Harvey Wallbanger? How is Harvey Wallbanger one word?' She laughed. This had been one of the better dreams. As she remembered the whole detox she fell back on her bed laughing. She laughed more than she should have been. It was all the emotions catching up with her. The dream. The fact he's coming. Her being in danger. The little girl being the Doctors daughter. Amy being Robyn's mother. All of this coming across in her, almost maniacal, laughter.

After a while, Michelle stopped laughing and slowly drifted off to sleep. Images flashed in her head. Some she had seen before. Some completely new. One image lingered more than the others. Her eyes opened and she realised she was facing the window. It was dark out. For a moment, she thought the Daleks had stolen the earth again. But when she looked at her clock, she sighed. "Gwen… Is going… To kill me." She mumbled. It was 7:30pm and she had missed school. Again. She shook this thought from her head. There was more important stuff to deal with. The Doctor said she didn't have much time, so surely he should be here already.

The sound of the door slamming shut echoed round the house. Michelle sighed. This had happened the other time she had missed school. "Michelle? Michelle are you here?" The fear in Gwen's voice clear. She almost didn't wanna call out to Gwen. She had explained soon after her mothers' death that one day she'd have to go. She needed Gwen to understand that. Since her mothers' death, she had been trying to tell Gwen about the Doctor without really telling her about him. She was a civilian, the less she knew, the better. Eventually, she called out to Gwen reluctantly. "I'm up here, Gwen." Gwen rushed into the room, the coldest look on her face. "Do you have any idea how worried I've…" Gwen started, but Michelle interrupted "Yes!" She said, anger building. Gwen needed to remember her place in Michelle's life. They didn't even really live together. Gwen lived next door. "Then why do you do it?" Gwen asked. "I didn't mean to, Gwen. I'm sorry." Michelle said, despising the word. She had nothing to be sorry for. Gwen sighed, sitting on the bed. "I just worry about you, that's all." This had started to get annoying and she couldn't bear to hear the 'I care about you.' speech again. Michelle sat up. "Well don't! You're not my mom!" She said harshly, knowing she'd pay for it later, but not caring. She stood and stormed out of the room, leaving Gwen sitting there speechless.


(Little later than promised but here it is)
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#Doctor: Amy was frightened. I was frightened. But we survived, you know, and the relief of it... And so she kissed me. #Rory: And you kissed her back. #Doctor: No, I kissed her mouth. #Rory: Funny.

#Companions; DOCTOR!!!

#Doctor: RUN!!!

#Doctor: Bowties are cool.

#Doctor: Fezzes are cool
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« Reply #5 on: January 19, 2011, 05:00:08 pm »

Multiple speakers per paragraph make the dialogue a bit hard to follow at times - at least, it did for me. Try starting a new one each time the speaker changes; it makes conversations easier to keep track of, which means less of having to go back and re-read paragraphs to make heads or tails of them.

On the plus, though, you've captured the essence of the Eleventh Doctor - his arrogant hubris and humour - excellently. Much better than any other fan fictions I've read, at any rate. The story itself is interesting so far too. Definitely looking forward to more.
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Torchwood Five

Episode I - The Brainstem Murders
Episode II - Vanishing Act
Episode III - Side Effects
Episode IV - The Villieneuve Incident
Episode V - Ritardando
Episode VI - Body Count
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« Reply #6 on: March 14, 2011, 01:59:15 pm »

I regret that regular access to the forum is no longer possible for me. I may post the rest of my story here someday but everything I have so far is at the following link for those less patient.

http://fanfiction.net/~TorchwoodRose

If you choose to click on the link, enjoy. Smiley
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#Doctor: Amy was frightened. I was frightened. But we survived, you know, and the relief of it... And so she kissed me. #Rory: And you kissed her back. #Doctor: No, I kissed her mouth. #Rory: Funny.

#Companions; DOCTOR!!!

#Doctor: RUN!!!

#Doctor: Bowties are cool.

#Doctor: Fezzes are cool
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